Husband cheated online?

[Brittany2150]

I read my husband IM logs because he had been spending way to much time on the computer and acting sneaky whenever I walked into the room. And it turns out that he not only asked a girl out nine hours after meeting her online, but also asked if she wanted to get married. Then I read another IM between himself and his friend claiming that he wanted me to get an abortion (I'm 8 1/2 weeks pregnant) so we could get a divorce because he wants to fool around. He then complained about wieght that I have gained and that I don't have sex with him enough. I'm just over it, I can do a lot better. He is in the military and is getting his discharge papers on monday. I want a divorce, because this isn't the first time that this has happend. I mean it's either some girl online that he is trying to have sex with or some ex girlfriend calls "out of the blue". I am just sick of it. It's obvious that he is never going to change and he doesn't love me. I don't want to file for a divorce now.Because I just want to go home and be with my family. I want a divorce but at the same time I just pretend like everything is okay. I feel like I'm going crazy because I'll be fine and then I'll just look at him and start hating him for everything that he has done. Anyway, I just need to vent...I haven't told any friends or family yet and I'm scared to because they told me not to marry him in the first place.Whenever I confront him about any of this he claims that he loves me and wants to work things out and will "never" cheat again.

[jeffb3219]

Swallow your pride and kick his sorry a$$ to the curb. You deserve better.

[lwomar8882]

Yes, I believe it is time for a divorce. Don't pretend anymore. Pretending doesn't help.

[kaylaiscoollikethat]

I think he really isnt worth it...just get rid of him.,..dont be scared to tell people and get "I told you so's" Those people sayin that will be the ones to comfort u and be there for u in the end!

[ndnqt19664933]

Seems your family was right in their opinion about not marrying your husband....I am so sorry that he is looking to cheat...saying mean and nasty things about the woman carrying his child....He is a f*cking selfish bastard that has no heart or conscience....I think you would be doing yourself and your baby a huge favor by leaving this miserable excuse for a man....

[tarie750954]

Go to your family and leave his a** behind and dont look back. Better yourself and your baby. Your family will be there for you, unlike him. I feel so bad for you, wish I was there to help you, really. You deserve only the best. Good Luck.

[sarahB5483]

well you know your answer.. get the abortion.. you don't want your child to have a father like that and it's not too late to do it either... your husband probably knows that you will always go back to him which is why he continues to treat you badley.. I am sure you are an extreemly attractive girl Pregnant or not and you most certanily don't deserve to be treated like $hit from you husband who can't seem to control himself.. Get out now and don't worry about what your family said.. people make mistakes and you seriously could have knowen any better... Get rid of him now before you have the child and then you have another reason to stay ina crappy relationship... Good luck... BTW as a christmas gift to him tell him you want a divorce and make it public and tell everyone he is a cheeting looser

[Princess7042]

Oh no! big mistake. dont blame your fam/friends for being with him. it was your choice since the start. im really sorry for what you're going through its sucks to be pregnant but he sounds like a complete fool! u sound like a nice inteligent woman and u can do much better than stick around with a loser who's trying to get chicks online.Much love. and goodluck xoxo

[mom]

Will your family support you while you figure this out? If so, go home. Allow family to help you, and file for divorce. Better times lie ahead. This is a painful learning experience, and if you have family support you will get through it. Take care of that baby. It deserves a real man for a father.Best wishes for a brighter future.

[pokvet1502]

Wow... sorry to hear that. I would call my parents and let them know whats going on, not like they're not going to find out anyway... so call em and tell them ur done. I would call them and tell them that ur marriage is over and the reasons why. I would then move back to my parents, have the baby , file for divorce then get my own place. U should also print out those conversations he had to take to ur lawyer and take his azz for everything he's got... to include his dreams. Once ur all settled cast ur line out there and find someone that's going to love u and treat u with the respect that u deserve. Best Wishes!

[Gayisha2088]

cheating is cheating...even online!

[LisaG]

Honey.. if you have given him more than enough chances to get his act straight and he still hasn't you need to move on with your life. You have more than just yourself to think about now, you have that baby to worry about, and staying obviously and continuously stressed is not going to make a happy or healthy pregnancy. Sounds like you need to pack a bag, head home, and be with your family, give yourself some time to think and figure out what YOU want, and what is best for YOU .. away from him, then make your mind up..Good luck!!

[chinadoll]

You must be strong as you deserve sooooo much better than him. Swallow your pride and admit to your family that they were right and they will do all they can to help you, that will surely be a lot easier than putting up with a life of misery? Good luck.

[amanda0667]

you should never ever stay with a looser just because you pregnant!!!!! hes a lying, cheating piece of s**t!!!! just think about your child and whats best for him/her... what if he goes out and cheats and brings back something soap and water cant was off? why do you stay when he treats you like you dont matter? the obviously doesnt love you, girl pack your s**t and move on!!!!!

[WeLoveMinPins]

Well what exactly is your question...I dont think anyone here can tell you what to do, but one thing is clear;you need to make a decision. what he is doing online is not right, I dont care how many people say "well its just online" I mean people do hook up with people they meet online. This is very serious, He could give you an STD, or worse. How is the your relationship aside from this online stuff? Are you Happy with him, do you get along??? also Does he regret it? Is this something you think you could get over, if not then theres no point in being with some one you dont trust.Good Luck! Really.

[Cece]

Bring your sexy back and kick his worthless ass to the curb. Pretending everything is alright is making you look like a fool. It's seems to me that you need him . You could do better all by yourself. "Seeing is believing" and you saw with your own eyes what he's doing to you and your family. You are only making things worst by still sticking around. Girl life is to short to be worrying about a man. Worry about your self and your future child. Men will come and go. This is your life your story . Make the best of it and it's up to you to determine what's happens in the next episode. More hurt or freedom you choose. (Also just because you have a child by him doesn't mean you have to be with him trust).

[Virginia5520]

Read Divorce Busters immediately - it tells you how to deal with cheating, cheaters, and the other woman.Counseling needed, too...Don't rush the divorce because the life of a single Mom is hell unless you are rich.If he's getting out of the military, so soon, he needs to get a job before you divorce him so you can get support.Start building your own support group: minister, family, friends, marriage counselor, and HIS Mom, etc.Quietly collect all of your evidence and put it away in case you end up in divorce court.After Divorce Busters, recommend reading:Fascinating Womanhood Created to be His HelpmeetJoy to you!

[melodyrose27]

"Don't be anyone's slogan, because you are poetry!"You should do whatever you think is best for YOU. If you know that he's not there for you, then he probably won't be there for his child. As far as the abortion is concerned, IT IS YOUR CHOICE!!! and nobody else!!! Having a child is a wonderful experience in itself, don't let him or your family ruin it for you. If you are able to raise a child by yourself, then go for it. It's not easy, but i think it would be easier than giving up your baby because of someone else and living with that for the rest of your life, or raising a child and projecting onto him all the anger your cheating husband causes you.People don't change that easily, and promises can be broken. But don't let him break you! If every time you want to leave he convinces to to stay, you're basically telling him that no matter what he does, you'll never leave. I may not know you, but i do know that nobody deserves to be treated like that.And as far as your family is concerned, before you can be honest with them, you first have to be honest with yourself!! You have to accept the fact that sometimes things work out and sometimes they don't, and when they don't you have to have the power to save whatever is worth saving and move on. I'm sure your family will be there for you if you ask for their help!!It may be a tough time for you, but you have to be strong!! Hang in there!!!

[gregva2001]

Oh yeah, get rid of this one, if you have had this happen before, it will happen again and again. The sooner you get a good lawyer, the better. what a stupid man he is!!!

[Roko1184]

awww honey, what the hell is wrong with guys (and some gals) today? Why all this cheating in these young (and even middle-aged men).Your feelings are so natural, knowing he's no good and so over it, yet bouts of anger and so on. In fact, you're a smart and courageous cookie but you're not alone dear.TDon't keep it all in because it come out in some unhealthy way. Find a therapist worth gold because you got to scream and cry. It's such a betrayal. Let the tears come and cleanse away the time this dirt wasted in your life. He's bringing life in this world and this is what he's doing?Honey, he is just realllly selfish and immature. It'll take him lots of time and many hard knocks to learn and truly repent and change. With you in the picture, he'll just continue these wicked ways.Me thinks, besides selfishness and immaturity, he is just a weak man, can't stand pressure of responsibility of baby and a man that doesn't even know what "love" is. It's not the beginning passion of a relationship, it's when you see reality and you nurture the relationship. Unfortunately his parents (and even society) do such a crappy job bringing decent men (and even women as I previously mentioned) into this world.You're right, once a cheater, 99% always a cheater. He'll do the same to any girl he's with long enough, unless he gets with a tamale that cuts his manhood off!*TELL YOUR FAMILY, you need love and support! AND DON'T TAKE ANYMORE OF THIS CRAP! It's like emotional murder! Don't buy his b.s. promises, that's how men like this hook girls! NO MORE DENIAL OR MS. NICE GAL. Get yourself prepared and get out!P.S. Are you going to have this baby? Make sure you be aggressive in getting spousal and child support, that MF is gonna pay!It doesn't seem you will abort, but gee whiz, he could even have siad he hopes you put it up for adoption to good family, he just wanted it dead. He's a sorry excuse of a man. I would beat him up if I was there sweetheart.

[Mindlessfun]

Be warned... the next guy will be prone to looking around if you don't have sex much.Make darn sure you marry a guy with a LOW sex drive. I am amazed at how little attention is given to being sexually compatible yet most women say that infidelity is their #1 concern.If it is your #1 concern.. then make it your #1 priority... it only makes sense.

[LovingLife1866]

I can forgive A mistake... I can not forgive constant intentional acts. Sounds like it's time to go. I wish you the best of luck, I know it will be hard. Let time takes it course, and then it will all be over with. Big hug! Keep your head up.