My ex husband just came back into my daughters life what is the reason for her acting like this?

[boooobi0540]

My ex husband cheated on me and remmarried the women he cheated with. They were even together in my home. I sold my house and moved far away to make the visits hard as i see them as trash And was afraid a women that would do that to me would be hateful and treat my daughter bad too. Well he would come up to get her anyways. Eventually he stopped coming he never made it to her fifth b-day he called but never came then dissappeared 3 yrs she was 4 and is now 7yrs. She is so scared to talk to him on the phone she even cries i know she loves her dad. I almost wonder if something didn't happened to her She will type away to him online but ask her to talk the phone it won't happen She says she needs time to get use to him again Is this situation right. Anything i can do to make it easier on my daughter?

[SquirrelTree]

She'll be alright. It's human nature to be distressed when children are unhappy but shell grow up, perhaps a better person for hving such experiences

[Sweet9680]

This is all your fault. You wanted to get back at her father by moving far away, and now you have ruined their relationship. When your daughter gets older she will realize all this could have been avoided if you weren't so selfish. You are still trying to scheme him by coming up with nonsense that he possibly touched her or something. You need help, and it's too bad your daughter got stuck with you.

[snizz35]

Sounds like you discouraged any relationship between your daughter and your ex and now that you have the desired results you don't like it.Of course you don't, because you transferred your feelings onto your child instead of making the right decision for her.All you can do now is make it easier for her by reassuring her that her dad loves her and be careful of what you say to others around her. She'll pick up all kinds of signals about her dad subconsciously through you!Good luck!

[nicelady5487]

i went through this same situtation with my daughter my ex threw me out when i was pregant for her then was in her leffe for awhile and then gone again then back it messes up a child really bad cause there afraid of rejection from a father does she show more signs of something happing you might want to talk to a counselor and get her in counseling cause my daughter is 11 now and she has to see a mental health worker cause he has messed her head up so bad so my advice is get her in counseling and see what they say

[jstagirl19695175]

im sure shes all to confused right now. she probaly felt abandoned by him. let your daughter make up her own mind on if she wants to see him or not. he also needs to understand he cant just show up out of the blue and try to start a relationship that he gave up on with her. shes also scared of being hurt by him again. i wouldnt allow your daughter to go stay all night or anything like that. plus with him being married, she shouldnt be forced to accept this woman. talk with your daughter and ask her how she feels about he situation and go from there.you have been her protecter from day one, trust me, shes really going to need you now. you being the mother dont make any rash desisions for her but let her make up her own mind. good luck to you.i wish your daughter and you the best of luckin being there for one another.

[GoGORessa1151]

It 's easy for any of us to say what MIGHT be going on. I would say... take her to a therapist. You can never be too careful.

[uniquechild1680]

Personally I think you must stiop him seeing her. He is clearly either abusing her or threatening her. Tell her she does not habvve to write to him or even talk to him if he scares her. Take her to a therapist and see what comes out in the wash. I think there is something wrong here...that way you can have an interdict put against the man if abuse comes out in the wash. Tell your child you will keep her safe no matter what even if it means you have to move again to hide from the man! She need not stay in touch with him even if he is her dad! You must protect her at all costs. How do you know he is not involved in Satanism or something sinister? Dont allow her to visit him. The fact that there are long gaps between visitations makes me wonder what he thinks he is doing! Make your child feel safe and dont allow him back into your life. What a jerk living in your house with a lover - what a cheek! That woman deserves to feel ashamed of herself! You deserve better than that too! Go to the child protection unit and ask their advice and seek the help of a therapist too! Be discreet about how you handle this for the childs sake and play it down in front of her if you are suspicious.

[Rein1243]

She has heard you talk about her father, either to her or others or both. You were the only parent she had for a while, so what you say is gospel.....how are you confused by this. Read about Parental Alienation Syndrome...this sounds like what happened here.