Should You End Up Being Friends With A Wife / Husband Who's Cheated?

[Davinio]

I was married to a women who after 7 years had an affair and decided to end the relationship.She said she'd met another women & that she was unsure of her sexuality, I believed her as I knew she had slept with a women before we had met.Although my world totally fell apart I couldn't help feeling sorry for her as she must have been confused with what was happening and I knew coming out was going to be tough. I then found out three months after we split that she was seeing my next door neighbours brother who i knew really well and moved him in the day the house was signed over to her.She says she only told me the woman story as she thought it would be easier to handle !!??This is only a small bit of information, there really is much much worse but knowing her like i do & know she can very easily implode, should I stay friends with her & forgive her or cut my losses. I'm not the sort of person that hates anyone but also know where to draw the line !!

[wenwen32]

FORGIVE HER AND CUT YOUR LOSSES.. MAYBE SOMETIME LATER IN LIFE WHEN MOST OF THE HURT IS GONE, YOU CAN BECOME FRIENDS.BUT THERE ARE ALOT OF MOUNTAINS TO BE CONQUERED BEFORE THAT.. GOOD LUCK..

[bubblewrapping]

I think just remaining civil would be the best option.

[Shirl]

You should have drawn the line the minute she thought about someone else. The fact that it's her confusion with her sexuality is neither here nor there- she cheated on you fact: and the more you put up with it the less you will feel able to break free from herfriendships and relationships don't last unless you trust each other

[chrisjc1970]

my exwife and i split twice the first time because she met someone else the second because we never got over or talked about the first time, we are now best friends and my outlook is that life is too short to bear grudges and have enemies, im very proud that i can move on, i hope you can be the same, lets face it 100 years from now we will all be worm food

[Meeeee]

Don't be too hard on her for lying to you - she was doing it to protect your feelings (even though you were obviously going to find out the truth eventually)Do you have kids together? If you do, stay on friendly terms with her.If you don't have kids with her, then it really is up to you whether you stay friends with her or not - you may *need* to stay friends with her for now, as having someone totally cut out of your life abruptly can be much more difficult. In time, you may both drift apart & you may not mind that - just do what feels right.Make sure you don't hold onto the idea of her going back to you though - start dating other women too.x

[Kelly7731293]

If you truly know where to draw the line you could have answered this yourself. Kick her to the curb. No matter the story she tells you, you will never get the truth. Cut your losses and don't have contact with her. She's only going to keep messing up your life with hers and you won't ever be happy.

[JimC]

Tell her to hit the bricks and move on to someone else that has morals and values. It's pretty obvious she doesn't.

[pussycat8244]

I think she should have told you the truth, but I also believe it is better for your own well-being to forgive and move on in your life. As far as being friends with her; doubt that will work if you are still in love with her and are using this as a way to keep in contact. You sound like a very nice person, so cut your losses and realize this was not the woman you married and not the one you wish to live your life with. Now, my first husband and I remain friends; it is all according to each individual. So, if you believe you can handle the friendship without any hope or wishes of reconciliation as part of the friendship, then - sure - be a friend, but no more.I

[free_angel5295]

Cut your losses. She couldn't cut it as a faithful wife. What makes you think she's going to be your marvelous friend?

[mt756895967]

For your own well-being, let it go. Why would you burden yourself by carrying around this resentment? You don't have to be friends with your ex, and you don't even have to see her if you don't want to. But if you had children with her, then that's a different story. In that case, it's best if you make every attempt to remain on friendly terms with her. This makes life so much easier for everyone involved.

[steveheremd]

Forgive and cut your losses. It would not do you any good to keep hate in your heart. It is a good sign that you can show compassion for her as she obviously needs to find herself. Consider yourself lucky to be free to move on and explore new things. Keeping good thoughts for her and others will bring you good Karma. Enjoy your own life now and treat her with the respect you would show to anyone else. Take care and enjoy life!

[nomoredreamin]

Tell her you'd like to be friends but you are too busy with your new boyfriend sorry. (two can play that game, then tell her the guys name is your ex neighbour) and see if she still wants to be any ones friend anymore. lol

[Bezza]

Well i would say be civil to her but you don't owe her any more than that. But I truly believe in time she will realise what a huge mistake she's made, you sound like a nice fella.