I found out my husband has been having cyber sex w/ another woman.?

[LisaB]

My husband has been cheating on me online. I know because I talked to her online. She lives a long way away, I know he would never run off w/ her but it is still cheating right? We have been together 5 yrs. What would you do?No it is some ugly woman in New YorkI need the putor for college

[pinkyismygirlfriendniluvhur]

underaged too I bet

[JohnF]

Join em'

[BobD8038]

You need to confront him on this. It is a form of adultary. Explain to him how it makes you feel.

[AshliJ]

WELL I WOULD JUST TELL HIM ITS TIME TO LETS GO

[david6966]

They are all cheats. When will women ever learn. Nothing is enough for the cheats. They love to scavange.

[HoneyBloodComa]

Get rid of the computer.Married people should not have them.And men are not to be trusted alone with anything,Especially a computer.

[james99889]

let him put it in ur pooter

[TheBrokenPlanet]

Change the internet account to your name, and then don't give him the password.Tell him to come see you if he wants to "whack it."EDIT: And don't buy into the crap that others are saying about not having a computer. It's not the computer that's cheating. It's the peckerwood using it.

[Ida]

the internet is an addiction. i would rip the internet out of our house and give him a second chance. if that fails then take furthur action.

[rissasmom]

I would confront him. Both of you need to get marriage counseling. There is a reason why he felt the need to find a friend online - there is something not quite right about your relationship. Get it sorted out now before it gets worse!

[JoeO]

If you feel that leaving him is the best thing to do, do it. If not, go to a consular and really pray to find out what is best.

[icedchris330]

leave it alone.if it bothers you enough, ask him to stop. however, you should be happy that it's just some stupid cyber porn instead of him really seeking out other women.maybe you should try it yourself. it could spark a new side to your sex life, which is probably the reason he's doing this in the first place.

[ELECTRA]

THis is some dilemna...I would say he's just feeling horny but it's still wrong to express these emotions with another women, If you confront him about see what he says...if he gets all defensive and upset put your guard up...but if he understands and agrees to stop then just be aware but your marriage should be ok

[wawawebis]

I have had friends with this situation. One got divorced because she found there were nearby women he was meeting. The other is still with her husband who we believe has really stopped going on line like that. The other, well, he is looking for men to have sex with and that is really tough on the marriage!! Counseling has helped each one of them.I have not had this experience, though I have been afriad of it because I have seen my friends go through it. I have told my husband I would break his computer! but that is because my heart would be broken.

[gabriellafirst]

ask him and if he tells the truth do something about it

[James]

Well, cybersex isn't real or actual sex (it's just an explicit conversation over the internet, plus it's not like they masturbate, which futher makes it not sex), so it's not like he's having a true adulterous affair, but you do have a right to be offended by his outrageous behavior. Threaten him with divorce and see if that gets him to stop.

[HidingMyWings]

I'm not positive that counts as cheating. It might be classified as 'talking to someone online'. Plus has he ever seen her? She could be a guy or an overinformed thirteen year old or something. I would talk to him about it. Tell him you know he's having cyber sex with some lady. Then threaten to break up with him. If he doesn't care, leave him. If he tells you not to, give him one more chance.That's what I'd do, even though I'm not married.

[AmandaL]

This is definately adultry. Save all emails or any record you have of it because you never know when you'll need it in the future...even if ten years down the line you get a divorce. Tell him how you feel.I'd flip out, shut the internet service off kick him out until things are rectified or until I decided to file for divorce.

[Bella]

Wow, I'm really sorry to hear about that. It seems to be happening more and more these days. I would talk to him about it. Tell him you know he's doing it, and you don't like it. If he gets that you find this hurtful, then hopefully he'll stop.

[abiona]

I'd confront him and require therapy immediately. he'd have to commit to never speaking with her again and re-commiting to marriage vows. unless of course there are deeper problems in your marriage and this is just a symptom of a bigger issue...in which case maybe this was his way of getting out?? anyway, he has to commit to changing and getting help. My very first inclination is to kick him out, but I do know that in marriage it's just not that easy...you have to at least try to make it work, right? good luck.(and yes, that's still cheating)

[dixie_n_pixie]

Cut him off from the internet and if you feel that strongly about it kick him out! I feel it's no different than if he was doing the chick down the street. Would he like it if you were doing what he did? I bet not. He needs to get help and stay away from the computer.

[john7549]

well, ask you husband nicely if he's seeing sometings in women in cyber space that he is not seeing in you! givehim some morethings to do in the house sohe wont have timeto go to the internet. maybe you need a little r&r for yourselves.

[candaceb]

I'm not sure what I would do, because I'm not sure how much it would bother me. But, I would certainly let him know that I know. I would not yell, but just casually mention it. I would wait for his reaction. The reports that I have heard say that once men start this behavior they aren't likely to stop. They will just find another way to hide it. Also, how did you "happen" to talk to her online?

[ranger_co_1_75]

It doesn't matter where you get your appetite as long as you eat at home.Talking with a woman on the PC is no worse than you dancing with some dude on the dance floor, or having a chat in the bar, or watching a dream boat actor. You are both getting turned on. Just go home for the finale.

[mamaw2305]

Perhaps your marriage is getting to the boring spot that some couples have.You and your husband need to spend some close time with just each other and do special things to make it fun.Talking to your hubby about this instead of going off the deep end can save or destroy your marriage.What he has done is not right and you and him need to work it out.He has cheated by talk but not by touch

[tneva]

Talk to him. but I would like to warn you that sometimes confrontation might not work if he is really doing what you are saying he's doing. He might just shut you down. I am speaking of observation of other relationship where the person who cheated most likely if he or she is talked to about the situation at the wrong time or maybe he or she is not in a good mood he might just start arguing so make sure he's well rested and ready for you to talk to him about it but don't wait too long or it's going to leave a damage in your relationship with him.

[GoodGuy53]

You need to treat it as seriously as cheating, because distance is the only thing from him taking it to the next level. And we live in the jet age. You need to get him to confide in you and a counselor so he can understands why he needs this.

[bundygil]

It's just entertainment for him. Means nothing. Just let him know you know. If you go all crazy about it, he'll just do it when you're not around. If he knows you know, then he'll keep within reason. He'll get bored with it soon.

[boxfervor]

I am a guy, have had many relationships that have never gotten serious because they don't want to. But I can tell you your husband cheated on you because he couldn't get what he wanted out of you, a little bit more.Take into consideration your legal status, your financial status. Maybe it is a little fling he is having and it might be time you both stuck up on a marriage consoler or this has been a rooted relationship where he is fulfilling his sexual desires.You have done nothing wrong on your part, but it does not mean your marriage is over. You both need to close these wounds and he needs to admit his mistake and confess to you that he has done wrong and broke his promise with you. It is up to you to accept his forgiveness and make sure it doesn't happen again. Get consoling and revamp your relations.You might want a lawyer on hand and get evidence on what he has done. To make sure that if you want out of the relation your not going out empty handed if you want to file adultery if it is illegal in your state.

[bussman691]

Ok something isnt working with your personal "s" relationship.Sitdown and talk it out. it is so far away dont sweat it so much Except if your relationship is 5 yrs. thats alot otime invested I as a man would chop his access to the computer codes names whatever "if you Love him"

[AlisaMarie]

Does he know that you know? Confront him about it. Not to be rude but maybe she is doing something else that your not. If he dont stop then I would leave him..Good Luck =]

[gordonm]

try to stick it out, talk to him. does he have a cam for the computer? sometimes the women have cams and like to be naked on them to excite the man and themselves. its more like being an exibishinist than cheating. people like to play out thier fantasies on there. hope things work out for the best for u

[DaniBosco9824]

I am sorry about this. I would try counseling and see if you can work things out. I don't consider never having met the person adultery. I think you have problems to be talked out. Good luck!

[tenderrose1977]

I had found out about my husband doing this as well. He tried to hide what he was doing, but to no avail. He tried to lie about it when confronted, but failed miserably. He has refused to stop cheating online and off. But it all started with him having online affairs. I seperated myself from him and will soon be doing divorce paperwork. It is definitely considered cheating and not because I said so. I hope everything works out for you and best of luck. Take care.

[abrennan01]

I would leave him. I think cyber sex is just as bad as physical cheating.