shattered soul
01-17-2008, 03:04 PM
Hi. I am new to this website and am trying to find ways to cope with my situation.
My husband has always been a bit of a lad but I genuinely thought that I had made him see a better way of life. He was great (the odd night at the pub) but I could cope with that.
He has not coped well with his Mothers death (first anniversary today) and he has turned away from any responsibility. he met the girl working in the bottle shop who was nearly 10 years younger than her and they started an affair. I found out about her 3 weeks into their 'relationship' and although my husband told her we were separated (we had an agruement and he was sleeping in the spare room), I was 6 weeks pregnant which sort of indicated that we werent as over as he would have her believe.
She apologised and vowed to let us work out our marriage, or not, without her interference. SHE LIED.
I have since found out that they resumed their relationship just before he was about to come into is inheritance a few months ago. My husband continued to live with me until he got his money as he had no other place to go. She knew we were living in the same house and she didnt care. What sort of girl does that? I thought we were trying to work things out.
She new I had a beautiful 18 month old and was pregnant again and didnt care. She in fact went away with my husband and my 18th month old the day I got out of hospital from having our 2nd daughter. She went away to my caravan (holiday place) - a place that I have been since I was 4 and my mother was in her caravan about 10 vans away from us. I would have driven 4 hours to hurt her if I had known this at the time.
My husband have been trying to work things out in between them obviously having a relationship and I feel so stupid. They moved in together the day that we moved out of our home (21st Dec) and she moved out of home with her parents to be with him. She has no regards for the kids and wont meet with me to discuss her role in their lives.
How long does this hurt last for? When does it get easier looking after 2 kids so young? I dont to feel like they are a burden and they are my life, but it is so hard at the moment. I get so upset when my 18 month old keeps saying dada and my 7 week old has no idea what he smells like or sounds like.
Why do men not want to go counselling? We actually didnt have anything majorily wrong with our relationship until his Mum died. Thats the irony. I would have never ever thought he would have cheated in a million years.
This girl who has no morals or care for anybody she is affecting is now sleeping in my bed. Does anyone know a good website I can name and shame her?
Has anyone been in a similar situation and taken their partner back ever. I wish for this so much because I love him and truly didnt want my girls to be from a broken home and yet I dont know how I could possibly take back this person, should he ever ask.
I would do anything to have my family unit back to a strong and love base, however would I be disrespecting myself as much as he has if I ever forgave him?
I may not get to anway (although I am sure the 25 yr old wont be a long term relationship). I sent him a txt tonight simply saying that I hoped that today wasnt too hard for him (his mum died 1 yr ago today) and that I would have a nice glass or red for his Mum tonight (which is what we did the night she passed away) and he told me to mention anything like this again as it no longer involved me.
Thanks for listening.
Shattered soul.
My husband has always been a bit of a lad but I genuinely thought that I had made him see a better way of life. He was great (the odd night at the pub) but I could cope with that.
He has not coped well with his Mothers death (first anniversary today) and he has turned away from any responsibility. he met the girl working in the bottle shop who was nearly 10 years younger than her and they started an affair. I found out about her 3 weeks into their 'relationship' and although my husband told her we were separated (we had an agruement and he was sleeping in the spare room), I was 6 weeks pregnant which sort of indicated that we werent as over as he would have her believe.
She apologised and vowed to let us work out our marriage, or not, without her interference. SHE LIED.
I have since found out that they resumed their relationship just before he was about to come into is inheritance a few months ago. My husband continued to live with me until he got his money as he had no other place to go. She knew we were living in the same house and she didnt care. What sort of girl does that? I thought we were trying to work things out.
She new I had a beautiful 18 month old and was pregnant again and didnt care. She in fact went away with my husband and my 18th month old the day I got out of hospital from having our 2nd daughter. She went away to my caravan (holiday place) - a place that I have been since I was 4 and my mother was in her caravan about 10 vans away from us. I would have driven 4 hours to hurt her if I had known this at the time.
My husband have been trying to work things out in between them obviously having a relationship and I feel so stupid. They moved in together the day that we moved out of our home (21st Dec) and she moved out of home with her parents to be with him. She has no regards for the kids and wont meet with me to discuss her role in their lives.
How long does this hurt last for? When does it get easier looking after 2 kids so young? I dont to feel like they are a burden and they are my life, but it is so hard at the moment. I get so upset when my 18 month old keeps saying dada and my 7 week old has no idea what he smells like or sounds like.
Why do men not want to go counselling? We actually didnt have anything majorily wrong with our relationship until his Mum died. Thats the irony. I would have never ever thought he would have cheated in a million years.
This girl who has no morals or care for anybody she is affecting is now sleeping in my bed. Does anyone know a good website I can name and shame her?
Has anyone been in a similar situation and taken their partner back ever. I wish for this so much because I love him and truly didnt want my girls to be from a broken home and yet I dont know how I could possibly take back this person, should he ever ask.
I would do anything to have my family unit back to a strong and love base, however would I be disrespecting myself as much as he has if I ever forgave him?
I may not get to anway (although I am sure the 25 yr old wont be a long term relationship). I sent him a txt tonight simply saying that I hoped that today wasnt too hard for him (his mum died 1 yr ago today) and that I would have a nice glass or red for his Mum tonight (which is what we did the night she passed away) and he told me to mention anything like this again as it no longer involved me.
Thanks for listening.
Shattered soul.